• Jen


Updated: Nov 24, 2019

It’s February and perhaps you’re in one of two places. Gone are the holidays and the hype of hitting New Year’s goals and creating vision boards and making plans. Maybe you’re someone who’s consistently been reaching every goal or checking off every box on your to do list and you feel the rush of momentum and success. I celebrate with you and you are inspiring me!

Or maybe you’re like me right now; struggling to complete the goals you set for January and scoffing because February is about to come to a close.

It’s the second month of the year and I already feel behind.

I planned to go in to 2019 with an air of newness. My bedroom would be spotless, my vision board perfectly curated, my writing notebooks, planners and limited desk space would be set up and ready for me to start working with passion and enthusiasm from Jan . 1

Instead, 2019 met me with some unfinished business from 2018 and new frustrations.

The first month of the year brought a major car issue that wasn’t an overnight quick fix. There were also intense deadlines at my full time job and a bad cold that sapped my energy for part of a weekend and week. The month felt endless, but somehow sped by before I’d really made any traction on the goals I’d set.

I know this has been a problem I’ve consistently faced each year. I get discouraged.I teeter between “yaay I am definetely going to get this done” and “ Oh God-- it’s never going to happen. Life gets in the way. Family emergencies. A full time job (which I love) but that requires often requires work on evenings and weekends, fatigue and the feeling of “i’ll never be good enough because I just don’t have the time to be good enough.

But I’m realizing that all of those things are cop outs. A scripture that comes to mind when I think about excuses I can make for not following my dreams. “ Teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom” ( Psalms 90: 12) This verse reminds me of how important it is to cherish the time we’re given and what it impressed upon me is to simply do our best with it. One way the scripture is phrased is “teach us to live wisely and well” When I think of this part of living well is not getting mired in the guilt of ,”I haven’t done enough, won’t be enough so I need to give up type situation.

Life can be hard and life can be busy, but instead of getting stuck in that what if my energy was mostly focused on the endless possibilities that lie ahead? I may not have the perfect blog post or perhaps I can’t devote full time hours to my dream because of my nine to five. But if I’m trying my best and investing my best. Perhaps it's an hour on the weekends or 15 minutes during a particularly busy workday. But its something and something is better than nothing at all.

My vision board may not be done, but neither is my year or life. There’s still time to work towards our goals and make things happen; even if your year didn’t start out exactly like you wanted.

One thing I did manage to do before the new year started was come up with a word for the year. Intention. I've tried words in the past, but to be honest I haven't really been consistent about really thinking about how the word applies to my life on the regular. I've been mulling it over and realizing that instead of just thinking about my intention for myself I need to constantly be asking God, Lord whats your intention for me in this situation? What’s the purpose?